Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Where are you every second I'm suffering?

Where are you when I need you?

This is the question that had been circulating in my head for two weeks." Where is him when I need him badly?"

Was suffered from Dengue fever for previous two weeks. Something that could have taken my life away. This is the moment when I need family and Him to be right beside me.

Monday afternoon, my back ache suddenly and I feel so cold in class. Yet, I had no choice but to continue my class till 6.15pm. I wrapped myself in three layers of jackets and couldnt even sit straight in class. Was trying so hard to concentrate but I failed, the pain is simply unbearable.

Monday night, went back to hostel immediately after class. Drop dead in my bed immediately. Thought it was just a normal fever but heck the my temperature increase significantly when I woke up. Took panadols but nothing seems to improved. My back is getting worst and I can feel that my body is getting weak. Couldnt sleep, couldnt eat, couldnt concentrate on studies.

Tuesday morning, wake up with fever still on. Went to Sick Bay with Aaron for a check-up. My temperature is so high it might cause brain damage. The nurse asked me to return back to hostel and get a quick shower to lower down my temperature. Later on, I notice I no longer have the strenght to even stand, lost my appetite, what ever that I eat taste awful! Lying in bed with my back aching and my head felt 10 times heavier, I really need my mom badly. He's in class. I'm suffering, really suffering, really pain.

Tuesday evening, went to SUC with Kim. Went to emergency department to see doctor to find out what really went wrong with my body. Cost my RM69 for panadols, flu medicine and cough syrup. Doctor couldnt identify what's wrong. Back to hostel with the same condition. Pain.

Tuesday night, He came, Cooked porridge for me. Put wet cloth on my forehead. And, left because there's nothing much he can do. Sleep for one hour and a half, wake up with my fever getting worst! He urged my brother to come quickly to bring me to Subang Jaya Hospital. Same opinion from doctor. My pain is still there. Mom came down to Sunway, picked me back to Melaka after that.

Wednesday, Thursday, fever is still on.Didnt hear much from him. Guess he is busy. But I couldnt afford to miss so many classes and the Prom.I know He was hoping I can attend. Decided to go back to campus on Thursday night. Still weak.

Friday morning, attended one hour of class. Couldnt concentrate and hence have to go back to hostel. Sleep for three hours. Shallowed 4 tablets of panadol to hold my pain. Was hoping that I am able to go to Prom with Him.

Friday night, Prom night. Went to Prom with Him. Took along my panadols with me just in case. Reached. People taking photos everywhere. Photo session is so long. I started to feel pain in my back. Need a seat badly but ball room is not ready yet. Wanted to shallow another two panadols, but heck I bring the wrong medicine. Holding my pain with smile on my face, people didnt notice I am so painful. Later on,He asked "Can you don't show me your sad face?" My heart sunk at that moment. I told Him, I'm simply weak. Went to bathroom, thank JY Female and Cheryl for their sincere help with my make-up. I need make up to cover my pale face. I couldnt stand long, my back starts aching again, Cheryl had to hold me. I'm weak. Seriously weak. But, did He know?

After Prom, MOS. I noticed I forget to bring my ID. His anger expression shows immediately. Didnt expect that to happened. He's frusfrated. All I can do now is call my brother up and picked me back to hostel. I left MOS. He entered. Back to hostel, get changed, and drop on my bed immediately. Too weak to stand any longer. Couldnt sleep well, was waiting for his call every second. Hope that he will come back to see me. But I'm just too innocent.

2.15am, He called. He finished his clubbing session.

To Be Continue.

3 comments:

NA said...

I wasn't there for. I'm sorry.

Guest said...

People make mistakes, and Aaron just did. But think of what had he done before that night. The happy moments when u all were together. It's the 1st time Aaron attend prom with d girl he loved so much, he doesn't want anything to go wrong of course. It's his fault when he showed you his temper, and cant b considerate..But he wouldn't know he had done this mistakes if no one tell him..Now he realised his mistakes and ask for forgiveness, means he is willing to change for you, and maybe even become a better man. No one can be exactly what you want them to be. But it's up to them to decide whether to become what you want them to be. Little caring and forgiveness of mistakes might be needed in this process. I really hope both of you will b together, or at least become good friends.

From: A friend who cares

NA said...

@guest.
I appreciate what you have said for me. Well, to be frank, I wasn't hoping someone actually helped me on this but yea, I do really appreciate and agree on what you have said.

We have happy moments enjoyed together as well. I admit that it's my fault in turning all this worst but for the least, I thought I can turn it back again. I was bad and wrong in treating her like this. She doesn't deserve it. Not a bit.

Sorry is only what I can offer.